The madness of me

Friends and choices

Sun, 01 Jun 2008 04:22:18 +0200

Recently i was broken into by who is still unclear but there has been alot happening who i thought it was is or maybe was a friend how ever that friend has had a very recent tragedy she lost her 6 day old daughter this has put me in a strange situation as we have maintained contact due to she claiming it wasnt her so i am now stuck between do i hate and ignore her during this very difficult and upsetting time or do i help her thru it like a good friend would.

Just 1 prob to this dilemma most people say i should hate her for what she has done to me as there is alot more than what i am writing in this but im not a hateful or nasty person and really she needs people around her to support her thru so this is the decision i have to make only i can make it but the other thing is i was just as small and ill as that baby so why can i survive and still be here at 21 and she cant i have a probable answer for this the situation which is most likely the main cause as the simlarities of everythin else is amazing but no matter what is thrown at me i look for the good in people so do i stop that or do i hurt my friend in this tough time i think not what sort of person would i be if i kicked her while she was down she needs me and my support if only for a short while at least im there and she is able to use me as support instead of strugglein and hurting even more.

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title-4240088

Wed, 28 May 2008 21:37:45 +0200

ok so i been a little quite recently there is a good explanation to this tho as my mate would say the shit hit the bloody fan so hard and fast it forgot to drop me off lol

not only is my flat and garden done over within days of each other i aint allowed to move and have finished uni for summer now there is a reason to go crazy hold on i forgot i already am o well the madness continues in my life.

not all bad tho i have some amazin friends an even cuter guy when he figures it and am a crazy to boot lol well what can i say ill have to get writin again

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Sucker

Wed, 16 Apr 2008 21:39:16 +0200

Well yet again in my life i have found myself once again sucked in to the sad trap of trusting people this seems to happen alot to me am to trusting for my own good as i see everyone like i see myself.

I dont lie smoke rarely drink and trust my friends alot until that trust is broken and then it takes a hell of alot to put it back but i will never trust that person the same again this happened again this week i trusted my friend she even had a key to my place and told her everything this however was an unbelievable mistake as we have now fallen out over a number of things mainly a guy and me going to the loo and locking my flat door behind me which is the reason for the use of a key but hey we all cant be brainiacs can we but logic would of thought to use the key instaed we have a 10 min argument on the rules of my flat

yes you may find this funny but i have spent the last 2 weeks making sure she is happy safe and looked after this has now been thrown in my face along with the guy who was also the point of an argument you would think ur friend would tell you the truth when you ask if they still like the guy but NO what does she do yes denys everything hence the argument o well maybe one day i will learn not to trust people as much and not fall for your mates boss.

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Why do people not talk about things

Fri, 04 Apr 2008 12:22:55 +0200

Why do people not talk about things that are hurting them instead of bottlin it up.

You love people so much and want to stop their pain but cant, i certainly wish you had spoken to me then maybe it would be different but ill be makin sure now ill seem like one crazy stalker but your my friend and am one fierce friend if thats the only good thing i can say about myself then thats the one i like.

Your an amazing person you seriously didnt think i would drop you that easy you aint gettin rid your stuck now mate lol.

You wait it will be 1 hell of a ride and i promise you that am not gonna lose you now anyway enuf ramblin this goes to you you know who you are am not gonna say names but get better my love and prayers are with you

Love S xxxxx

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Dont u hate the truth !!

Tue, 01 Apr 2008 22:34:02 +0200

Dont you just hate it when your best mate goes all out on you and tells you everything you dont want to hear well today i got the lot

1. my choice in men
2. my choice in friends
3. how i screw with my own head
4. my ex bfs
5. how i am not good enough for 1 certain guy

yes today she hit me with all of these the main 1 was number 5 how i like a certain friends friend and how i am nowhere near good enuf for him or his standards apparently only your friends tell you how it is this certain guy is extremly clever from what i know of and apparently weather or not im good enuf for his social standing in the community or not he just playin me to get at my mate and wind her up of past events why can mates never accept you for who you are and why do they feel the need to tell you your not good enuf when they dont even know the damn guy.

its like ooo hes extremly good looking and your not u cant have him coz he wont want you or how did they say it why would he want someone like you when he looks like that and can have them queing round the corner you got no chance girl.

well this is my message to them i can have who i want i dont need to be all girlie and in dresses to look decent and if he dont want me then thats fair enuf at least i wont get hurt in the process.

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ok first one

Mon, 31 Mar 2008 00:04:48 +0200

Hey

This is my first blog in the madness of me and will see how we do thought it mite be good to do this and write down everythin i do not just flop when the weekend comes

ok so firstly date 30.03.08

just tell u about last nite thats prob more intrestin it was my 21st party @ kierby hotel with the rest of the gang and the party was absolutely fab everyone was very good and i stopped pappin myself about what i was wearing a dress yes peeps that is a dress heart attack city i know but i survived the party and the time in town afterwards although i think my friends were worse for wear this morning (you know who you are !!!)

I also got to put my first aid into use which was one hell of a shock at 6am but there we go glad to say she is perfectly fine and continues to rib me daily yes u know who you are i wont grass on her just yet

reason for daily piss take of course you guessed it a guy the only reason for your best mates to take the mickey and most of the time they succeed but what is life without the ups and downs this paticular guy is known of course to them so thanks mates bring it on i can handle it wait till i get my way and revenge little miss ill get you back lol

anyway enuf blabbin on only supposed to be an intro but a great time was had by all and those of you who didnt turn up or forgot or in some cases left on a doorstep (sorry chick) you missed a damn good time

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